Wednesday, May 9, 2012

life-altering moment

I was a senior in high school, and I had not yet developed the calm, cool, and controlled exterior that I possess today. The insecure middle school girl that lurks inside every female was right there at the surface, constantly threatening to rear her insecure crazy head. We were about half-way through our basketball season. I loved basketball, but unfortunately my desire and my heart far outweighed my actual talent. This was pretty much the constant of my high school sports career: always the winner of the “best hustle” award, never the winner of the “MVP” award.

 Anyways, there we were, playing one of our toughest competitors, Deerfield from Albany (I say toughest competitors as if we ever actually had a chance to beat them. We didn’t. They were far more talented than we were.) The starting 5 from our team were about to be announced and we would run into the center of the court to the rousing cheers and acclamation of our peers (ok fine, spattering applause of our parents and cheerleaders, but still). I’m not gonna lie, I loved loved loved having my name called over the loud speaker. I loved being a starter, I loved casually running out there with my head held high, knowing I was one of the best on my team. I was super vain back then. Thank goodness I outgrew that. I digress.

 Three of my teammates names and numbers were called, and were waiting at the middle of the court, looking calm, cool, and collected. We were so awesome. Then the announcer bellowed: “AND NUMBER 5, THE CENTER AT 5’11, KKKKKKKKAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEE MMMMMMAAAAAAYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

 The crowd goes wild! Yay Katie, you’re so awesome and amazing Katie!!!!!!!! You’re the best!!!!!! The absolute best in the world!!!!!!!!!!!!! (they might not have been saying it, but they were sure thinking it)

 And I was like, “allright Katie!” Cool… I’m glad everyone thinks she is so awesome”

 But then the death blow came…. One of the most memorable and humiliating moments of my high school life (just goes to show you how easy my high school experience was). The announcer, in a moment of pure evilness, followed up that glowing presentation with: “and finally number 10, her sister, Jessica.” Woomp, woomp, woomp…..

 Talk about taking the wind outa my sails. I ran to the middle of the court with my head about to explode. The stupid announcer zeroed in on one of my biggest insecurites at that time and broadcasted it to the world (okay fine, to the gymnasium full of most of the people I hung out with on a day to day basis). I was the older sister! I was supposed to be better! SHE WAS MY SISTER DANG IT!!!!!!!! 

Well, needless to say I did not have a good game. From that second on my mind was elsewhere… That guy totally psyched me out, and I played horribly. My coach should have realized that the game had ended for me before it even started. But he didn’t. Oh well, I digress and this is getting really long and a little boring. …

 I can finally admit it. Katie was a way better basketball player than me. She was taller, yes, but she also just had better skills. (Wow…. It was actually difficult to type that. Maybe I’m not over this yet….) Anywho, at the time the mere suggestion that Katie was better than me was enough to completely throw me off and reduce me to a pile of angry insecure mush. I mean, everyone knew it…. I knew it, she knew, anyone who watched us play knew it. And I HATED that. HATED IT!!!!!!!!!!!

 So now, Katie, I challenge you to a one on one match. The only catch: we both have to wear our babies…. That could be really fun! I bet you thought there was a point to this post, and that I would end with a moving lesson and tie it all up nicely, but I’m not going to. I mean, the gospel implications are clear, and my kids are waking up from there naps….


  1. loved it; i never knew you felt that way. You were both so much fun to watch

  2. You know what, at the end of the day, you really are an overall better athlete than me. I've always known that. And I've always HATED IT!!!!!!